


Child For Us

by Higgies230



Category: Shameless (US)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Bipolar Disorder, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-03
Updated: 2018-07-27
Packaged: 2019-06-04 21:18:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 7,094
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15155843
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Higgies230/pseuds/Higgies230
Summary: An AU where Mickey is released after one year instead of eight.Months later Ian and Mickey were going strong. They had moved back into the Milkovich house and Mickey had gotten a job in construction. Ian continued with EMT and Mickey told him how proud he was that he had gotten stable and had gotten himself such a brilliant job. There was only one factor in their new life that got to Ian and that was Yevgeny.Where in Ian really wants a kid just for them but is too afraid to ask and Mickey knows there's something going on because if Ian wants a kid there's no reason why he shouldn't ask.





	1. Released

  To say that Ian was shocked to see Mickey Milkovich on his doorstep was an understatement, he was someone who definitely shouldn't be there and yet there he was. The light from the porch showed off every line on his face and cast shadows around his blue eyes. Despite that it was definitely Mickey standing there on the Gallagher doorstep at ten at night seven years before he was due to be released. The guy had a minimum of eight years and yet here he was after only one and man did he look good. He had been working out in the joint and he looked so good because of it and oh was Ian so glad to see him there. 

  The paramedic shook his head, he knew that his mouth was hanging open and he must look like an idiot. He couldn't really help it though. He scanned over the other again, taking in the rough beard and the long hair that was poking out from beneath a beanie and boy did Ian itch to run his hands through that hair. He knew he had to say something to him now.

  "How? Why... I mean Mickey you're out," he stuttered out.

  "They revised my case, there was a lack of evidence. Got out today," Mickey explained, it was the first thing he had said and Ian had to suck in a shaky breath when he was hit by just how much he had missed that voice.

  "Oh right. Have you umm... have you been home yet?" Ian asked quietly for a lack of anything else to say.

  "No I haven't I... fuck I missed you Gallagher," Mickey said after only a moment of hesitation. 

  Ian just stared at him. Mickey had said that to him before, last time he had gotten out of juvie. Mickey had also told Ian that he loved him right before he went to jail. After everything, Ian couldn't help but feel almost unbearably guilty. Seeing Mickey stood there on the Gallagher doorstep saying things like he missed Ian made him realise his feelings for the other man all over again. The man that he had broken up with, the guy that he had only visited in prison after his wife had paid him, the man he had tried to get over by seeing other men.

  "Hey man say something please," Mickey begged nervously and Ian realised that he had been caught in his own thought too long.

  "I'm so sorry Mick," Ian half whispered, voice hoarse from emotion.

  "Wait what for?" the thug asked confused.

  "For not visiting. For trying to move on, for breaking up with you. For treating you like shit and taking everything you did for me for granted. I'm sorry for everything Mick," Ian blurted.

  Mickey's blue eyes flicked over Ian's face, seeming to take a moment to process Ian's words. He'd never seen the other look so open. The other man looked hopeful and yet so sad all at the same time. After a moment he looked directly into Ian's eyes, his being so unbelievably blue and beautiful. For a second Mickey didn't say anything and in that second Ian felt his heart stutter. What was the thug going to say? Did he forgive Ian? Did he never want to see Ian again? Was this the last goodbye? God he hoped desperately that it was the first.

  "I love you," Mickey said after that second and it was the last thing that Ian thought he was going to say.

  "I love you too. So, so much Mickey and I really am so incredibly sorry," Ian begged, chocking on some of the words as he suppressed tears.

  "Yeah yeah I believe you firecrotch," the other smirked before he grabbed the front of Ian's shirt and pulled him in for a hot kiss. It was the best, most satisfying and relieving kiss of his life. 

  Eventually they pulled back for air but only far enough that their noses still brushed. Ian stepped forward, Mickey stepping back with him, as he shut the door behind them so it was just the two of them stood together on the porch. From where he was, Ian studied Mickey's face, his hands still cupping Mickey's cheek with Mickey mirroring the position with his own hands on Ian's face. 

  Ian leaned in to peck Mickey on the lips then moving to place light kisses down his jaw before pulling the other in as close as possible to his chest. As he wrapped his arms around the man he loved he couldn't stifle a sob, burying his face into Mickey's neck as the tears started.

  He knew that Mickey was crying too but the other still managed to comfort Ian. He was rubbing slowly at the soft hairs at the base of Ian's skull like he always did and the familiarity was unbelievably good. Even as the hand continued to rub, Ian felt the shoulder of his shirt get damp where Mickey's face was pressed close so he started rubbing his own circles into the base of Mickey's spine.

  "I love you," Ian whispered into Mickey's neck, his lips brushing lightly over the skin there, "I am so glad they let you out."

  "Yeah I'm glad too tough guy," Mickey smiled as he pulled back to look at Ian.

  The other was running his hands through Ian's hair and he only thought it fair that he got to run his hands through Mickey's dark locks also. So he did. He trailed his hands up Mickey's sides from where they had been resting against his waist and slid them into his hair, under the beanie that they let fall to the floor.

  "Yeah I'm gonna cut that," Mickey commented, closing his eyes as Ian massaged his scalp with his long fingers.

  "Well keep a bit of length, a buzz cut would be a bit... inconvenient," Ian smirked.

  "So does that mean you revoke the whole breaking up thing?" Mickey asked with a wide grin.

  "Yeah... I suppose," Ian teased before leaning into another deep kiss.

***

  Months later Ian and Mickey were going strong. They had moved back into the Milkovich house and Mickey had gotten a job in construction. Ian continued with EMT and Mickey told him how proud he was that he had gotten stable and had gotten himself such a brilliant job. He commented on how well Ian had adjusted to the pills, how normal and _Ian_  he was. Everything was almost perfect. There was only one factor in their new life that got to Ian and that was Yevgeny.


	2. Yevgeny

  Svetlana was living with Kev and Vee in that weird thruple thing they had going on, they lived with Kev and Vee's twins and Yevgeny. Ever since the whole kidnapping incident Svetlana had never left Ian alone with her son, the times when she would come over and let Ian hold the kid were the best. Ian really loved the kid. Now that Mickey was back she had taken to dropping him off at the Milkovich house on odd days to spend time with his dad. That actually meant that Ian got to look after him because although Mickey was coming to love his son he still wasn't very paternal.

  That morning was one of those mornings. It had been four months since Mickey had been released from prison and they were great. Ian always woke up early to go on his run before coming home for breakfast and meds. Today he would do that and it was his day off so he had the whole day to spend with Yev. He couldn't wait.

  As ever Ian woke and turned to see that the clock on the bedside table read five am. Besides him Mickey slept soundly, back pressed against Ian's chest with Ian's arms thrown over him. Now it was just a matter of untangling himself. Wasn't too hard as Mickey could sleep through anything so as soon as he was free he placed a gentle kiss on Mickey's temple before leaving him to sleep.

  By the time he had ran and showered it was almost seven and Mickey was still asleep so he quickly downed his pills and went back to bed. He curled around his boyfriend who groaned sleepily before pulling Ian's arms tighter around him. Now that Ian knew he was awake he peppered kissed down his jaw and neck then down lower and lower. 

  Once he had given Mickey his good morning blowjob and jerked himself off they both lay there smiling happily and exchanging lazy kisses. It was a pleasantly warm day so far, not a scorching Chicago day like they usually got. It meant that Ian could bask comfortably in the warmth coming through the window with his boyfriend who's hands were lazily playing with Ian's hair.

  "Svetlana's bringing Yev over today," Ian mumbled against Mickey's neck.

  "Hmm yeah I remember," Mickey replied sleepily.

***

  It had gotten to the point where Svetlana trusted Ian enough with her son so that when he opened the door she handed the toddler right over. Ian grinned and held the little blond boy close to him as the child grabbed onto his hair. Yev loved his hair, much like his dad (something that Ian often teased Mickey about), so he always grabbed it although Ian had now managed to get him to do it gently.

  "I see you later Orange Boy," Svetlana said, giving him a brief kiss on the cheek before leaving.

  "Een!" the little boy in his arms squealed happily as he closed the door and moved further into the house.

  Yevgeny had been speaking for only a few weeks now but he had mastered "Dada", "Mama" and "Een". Ian had taught the boy who his Dada was, Mickey had blushed deeply when Ian had pointed at him one day and asked Yev who it was getting the reply of "Dada". 

  The first time that Yev had said his name he had felt his heart skip a beat. He had been in Mickey's arms and Yev had pushed at his chest and told him" No, Een" while pointing at Ian. The ginger had had to force back tears because he was so honoured to be one of the first people that his boyfriend's son acknowledged. Mickey had smiled fondly at him and he had had to look away, embarrassed at how much that one word had effected him.

  Now Yev said it all the time but Ian still couldn't help but grin and give the boy a kiss on the head every time. He looked so much like a blond version of his father was such beautiful blue eyes just like Mickey and Mandy had. He loved playing with the boy and seeing those eyes light up, hear that sweet, innocent little giggle as Ian tickled him.

  He also loved seeing Mickey with his son. Since he was born Mickey had become closer and closer to the child. Ian loved nothing more than to see Mickey cuddling the child or feeding him. His boyfriend would often make silly faces to get Yevgeny to giggle at him which would bring a bright smile to his face. 

  This day was no different, they both had the day off today so they could spend time as a little family and Ian loved every minute of it. However when six o'clock came around he couldn't stop himself from watching the clock. They only had an hour left before Svetlana came back for her son. He would look at it every five minutes as he played with the boy on the floor. Ian knew that Mickey noticed and tried to stop but he really couldn't help himself.

  When Svetlana arrived he handed over the child with a last goodbye kiss and a little wave. When he shut the door and he turned back around Mickey was right there. The smaller man pulled him forward into a warm hug, his tattooed fingers stroking the base of his neck comfortingly.

  "You okay man?" he asked, pulling back to look at Ian's face.

  "Course I am Mick, there's no reason I wouldn't be. You worry to much," Ian smiled, it was fond and not forced even though his heart ached because he had Mickey here and Mickey was adorable like this. Before the other could say anything else, Ian kissed him chastely and pulled away to go and do the dishes.

  He couldn't let Mickey knew how he really felt. That every time the boy came over Ian just wanted a child more and more. One for Mickey and himself. One that lived with just them, their own forever. One that they could watch grow properly, one that they could always be there for. See every first and be there for every problem.

  What he wanted wasn't fair on his boyfriend. Mickey didn't really want the kid he had. There was no way he would want a child with Ian. It was something that Ian would never ask for not now, not ten or even twenty years down the line and God he hoped they lasted that long. He was sure they wouldn't if he asked for such a thing though. It would out a wedge between them and that was the very last thing that Ian wanted. He'd already pushed Mickey way to much in the past.

  Every time he had pushed Mickey one or the other got hurt. More often than not it was Mickey. When Ian pushed Mickey to come out for instance. When Ian pushed Mickey to kiss him and get closer to him and Mickey invited him over and Terry found them. Svetlana and Yevgeny were all Ian's fault because he pushed. Mickey being beaten and raped was Ian's fault because he pushed. Ian was never going to push Mickey into anything ever again. 


	3. Does He?

  Mickey may not have been the brightest person alive but he did pride himself on knowing Ian. He and Ian had been fucking long enough and hell dating long enough for him to know the way that his boyfriend thought. They had been involved (that was just the simplest way that Mickey could think of putting it) for seven years. They had grown form teenagers to men together. They had been through good times and bad and now they were practically married. Hell Mickey knew that he wanted to spend the rest of his life with Ian, there would never be anyone else for him.

  He was so proud of Ian. He had been a mess when Mickey had landed himself in jail, bipolar and refusing to take his meds. He worked as a stripper and had just got back from a stint with his even more crazy bipolar mother. Now Mickey had come back to a stable man on his meds who had put himself through training and tests to get a job where he saved people on a daily basis. Ian smiled and laughed and loved life like he had before the bipolar. He was not quite the same, but then again Mickey would have been concerned if he was, but he was as close to the old Ian as he would ever get. When Mickey had told him that he was proud Ian hadn't shied away from him like he had feared but had grinned from ear to ear and kissed him deep and full of love.

  Watching Ian with his son was worrying though. Ian had always been a father to the kid longer than he himself had bee. He had loved the boy since the very first time that he had seen him- unlike Mickey who had barely been able to look at him. When Yev had first said Ian's name Mickey saw Ian choke up, he had never seen the other man happier. Yet every time that he left Ian was so quiet and sad. He would try and pretend that everything was normal but Mickey saw through it, Ian had never been a good liar.

  Every night after a visit from Yev the sex would be slower and more passionate, Ian made sure that Mickey was well and truly cared for. After Ian would lie with his head on Mickey's chest with his arms curled around him as opposed to their usual spooning. Mickey loved it, loved how affectionate Ian got and often found it strange how naive he had been to so consistently fight affection like he had for so many years.

  Thing was, he could see it in his boyfriend's eyes. He wanted a child, Mickey wasn't stupid. Nor did it really surprise him. Ian had buckets of younger siblings which he had taken care for, he had then had Yevgeny before he had been hospitalised. There had always been a baby and Ian had always been so good with them. 

  The thing that did surprise him was the fact that Ian never asked. Ian had always asked when he wanted things from Mickey down to something as small as a kiss (which had seemed like a huge matter at the time). He had never been shy about it and he would have thought that this time would have been no different. It was so clear every time he looked at the toddler with yearning but Ian never asked.

  Mickey even pushed and prodded (in his own way). He tried to see, to confirm his suspicions about the whole situation. Every time Yev went and Ian would get that unhappy look Mickey would ask if he was okay. The thug would press and give Ian every opportunity to ask but Ian would just look strained and uncomfortable even as he hid behind smiles and said he was fine.

  He just didn't understand it. He knew Ian wanted to ask. He needed Ian to ask just to stop the doubt.

  Despite this need, Mickey wasn't actually sure what he would actually say in response to such a question. Did he want another kid? This one would be with Ian, it would be theirs and only theirs. It wouldn't be some mistake. It would be theirs to love. On the other hand it was a kid... Another one that Mickey could ruin, taint. It was all well and good having Yevgeny part time but to have one all the time...

  Still, he had to get Ian to ask. He had to have that conversation with his boyfriend because if he didn't he was going to go mad. He needed to know why Ian was holding back because there had to be a reason. So he geared up for it. He was working on their latest construction sight, only half paying attention as they demolished the walls and collected the rubble. All he could think about was Ian.

  He got home two hours before Ian as he should, enough time for him to shower and scrub away all the dust and dirt from the site. He used to hide behind layers of grim, it used to keep people further away like the dirt was him. Every since Ian though he hadn't felt that need, he actually found he enjoyed being clean. Seemed Ian brought out the best in him in every way. 

  "Hey Mick I'm home!" he heard Ian call as he was in the kitchen making coffee.

  "Kitchen!" Mickey called out in reply.

  "Hey, before you say anything it was a patient. He was panicking and he accidentally hit me in the face," Ian rushed as came into the kitchen and gestured at his black eye.

  "Well as long as you're okay," Mickey muttered, coming forward and rubbing a gentle hand over the bruise.

  "Are you okay. You looked stressed," Ian asked, searching Mickey's face with his perfect green eyes.

  "Yeah Ian I um... I need to speak to you about something," he replied.

  "What's wrong Mick?" Ian asked him, cupping his cheek in one hand.

  "You're so good with Yevgeny. You love him don't you?" 

  "Yeah Mick thought that was obvious," Ian laughed although his shifted uncomfortably and dropped his hand making Mickey all the more sure that he was right.

  "Do you want a kid? You know us to have a kid together. One that is ours alone to raise," Mickey asked slowly, watching as the blood drained from Ian's face. That certainly wasn't the response he has thought he would get. He thought there would be relief or something, like Mickey giving him permission to ask, to get it off his chest.

  "No off course I don't want a kid Mick. That's a stupid idea. Anyway we already have Yev," Ian scoffed but it was too late for him to cover up his shock. 

  "Bullshit Ian. God you'd think that you'd know that I can always tell when you're lying or at least learn how to lie better. I mean Christ Gallagher really?" Mickey scoffed, shaking his head.

  "I'm not lying," Ian insisted, his jaw was tight and his shoulders set, leaning back slightly from Mickey.

  "Why the hell not then? You love kids."

  "We've got Yevgeny. You have a kid already."

  "It's not the same Ian, he's only here part of the time. Anyway he's  _our_  kid not mine!" Mickey yelled, frustrated because apparently Ian still thought of himself as outside of their little family and it pissed Mickey off that he still held himself back.

  "There you go then Mick.  _Our_ kid. Why would you want another one?" Ian yelled after taking a step back. He looked dangerously like he wanted to cry.

  "Me?  _I_  wouldn't want? This isn't about me Ian! I asked  _you_ if  _you_  wanted a kid. Not me!" Mickey yelled back, God the redhead was frustrating when he got all selfless.

  "Yes Mickey because if  _we_  have a kid it won't just be mine. You don't want a kid so I don't want a kid. That's it," Ian said and this time it was quiet and it was obvious even more so now that he was having a hard time trying not to cry.

  Mickey looked at him, he had nothing to say to that. Did he want another kid? He still wasn't sure. He didn't get a chance to answer though because Ian turned and left. He heard the shower turn on and when Ian got out he want straight to bed.

  It wasn't long after that that Mickey joined him. Stripping down to his boxers he tentatively got under the covers. To his great relief Ian rolled over and wrapped his arms around Mickey, nuzzling the back of Ian's neck.

  "Ian-"

  "Shut up Mickey." 


	4. Watching

  The next time that Yev came around was four days after Mickey confronted him about a kid. Ian had shut that conversation down once and then again when his boyfriend started up when they went to bed. He was angry because he had been too obvious, he hadn't said anything but he had to have done something to make Mickey anxious enough to ask. He'd asked Ian and Ian had seen the worry in his eyes, it confirmed everything that Ian was already certain of; that Mickey didn't want a kid. And so he had shut him down but he had curled up with the man that night as ever just to show that he was not angry at him.

  He hadn't been able to help his actions in the last few days. Really he knew that he was probably making things worse but every time he saw Mickey he just felt this burning need to make it up to him. He was extra kind and helpful, he woke Mickey every morning before he had to go for work with a blowjob before getting up to make him breakfast. He made him lunch to take with him. He kissed him goodbye and made his way off to the station before coming home and making dinner. He didn't make a single sarcastic remark and did everything to make sure that he didn't annoy his boyfriend. 

  Thing was, he knew Mickey noticed. Really Ian would have been worried if he hadn't. The thug had gone to comment on it once but Ian had shut him up with a kiss and ate him out until he couldn't remember what he was going to say.

  When Yev was there though, he could feel Mickey watching his every move. Every smile, every glance, every time that Ian ran his fingers through the soft blond hair or bounced the boy on his knee. Every time that Ian got Mickey's son to giggle or grin, every time move Ian made when playing with him. Every little detail and it was more than a bit disconcerting. 

  The paramedic knew that he had smiled less that day, had been more withdrawn from the boy, but he couldn't help it. He felt like Mickey was judging him and now that he knew Ian wanted a kid. Maybe he could persuade Mickey that he didn't want a kid if he was less affectionate towards the one that they cared for now.

  When it was time for Yev to go Ian handed the boy to Mickey and went off to make himself a pot off coffee in an attempt to quell the shaking in his hands. He saw Mickey giving him a curious look but he ignored it in favour of making his way to the kitchen.

  "Okay we need to talk Gallagher. Like now because as great as having a mindless servant has been I want my boyfriend back," Mickey snapped behind him.

  Ian didn't turn to face him only put down his mug and clenched the side. Mindless servant... Well he supposed he had been really. He knew that they couldn't carry on this way but he didn't want to talk either. Mickey didn't want a kid and Ian didn't want one if he didn't. That was that. There was no talking needed.

  "I'm sorry. I'll stop," Ian said, still facing away from the other.

  "I don't want you to be sorry Ian. I want to know why you've been acting so fucking weird," Mickey snapped, walking over and grabbing Ian to pull him around.

  Now that he was facing the other he found that he couldn't look into the other man's eyes so instead he focused on his chin. Mickey still gripped his arm almost painfully tight but when he saw that Ian was avoiding his gaze he used his other hand to grab the ginger's chin.

  "Fuckin' look at me," Mickey growled.

  "I was just trying to be nice. I felt guilty and I was just trying to make it better," Ian confessed.

  "Guilty about what?" Mickey asked, he looked worried and confused and Ian found that he had been making the other look like that too much lately.

  "The whole kid business. I didn't mean to want one. It's not fair on you. But I don't... I don't want a kid. I don't want you to worry about that okay. We can just put all this behind us, pretend it never happened and I will just stop. Okay?" Ian told him.

  He tried to pull away and kiss Mickey but the other roughly shoved Ian backwards. Grimacing as his back hit the counter, he looked at Mickey and clenched his jaw as the other looked apologetic.

  "Mick what was that for?" Ian demanded.

  "Fucking trying to distract me from talking again. Why the hell do you keep doing that? I want to talk about the kid Ian!" Mickey yelled. Great, they were yelling now.

  "Yeah Mick well maybe I don't want to talk about a fucking kid that doesn't exist!"

  "Why huh? You say that you don't want the kid but you are lying to my face!"

  "Mickey you don't want a kid! I am done pushing you to do things that you don't want to do, it always ends badly for you! I am not going to ask anything of you like that again I promise," Ian said, slowly getting more and more quiet as the guilt caught up with him once more.

  "What the hell are you talking about?" Mickey asked, he too was quiet. He came over to Ian and cupped his jaw, pulling him in close.

  "That time I got you to kiss me and then I came over and your dad found us and he beat you and had you raped, when I pushed you to come out and your dad beat you. Then when I got out of hospital and I kept calling and you came back and had to put up with all my bullshit and craziness and running away and breaking-" Ian rambled before Mickey cut him off with a kiss.

  "Now look who's distracting from talking," Ian joked when Mickey pulled away a moment later. He felt wet on his face and God he was crying, he couldn't believe he was crying.

  "I want a kid too Ian," Mickey said against Ian's lips as he gently wiped the tears from the ginger's face with his thumbs.


	5. Stress

  They hadn't actually spoken about children again after Mickey told Ian he wanted one. It was strange really because his boyfriend went back to normal but he didn't bring up the subject again even though Mickey knew that a kid was something he really wanted.

   Even though they never talked about it Mickey was constantly thinking about it in the next few days. He could just see the little ginger toddler running about, it had to be Ian's spunk with a surrogate because he already had a kid. It was weird thinking about Ian being a dad, hell it was weird when he thought about himself being a dad and he already was one and had been for a while now.

  The more he thought about it though the more worried he got. It was one thing having a kid part time and a whole other thing to have one full time. God he could remember Yevgeny screaming through the night when he was a little baby and Mickey wasn't even there for the first few weeks of his life. Both he and Ian worked full time now, they would have to get someone to regularly sit the baby. Then there was cost, babies cost fucking tonnes, Mickey remembered. Hell they would practically be buying the thing anyway... 

***

  Ian looked over at Mickey as he sat at the kitchen table nursing a mug of coffee. The paramedic was leaning against the kitchen counter with his own mug in hand, Mickey was angled in such a way that he couldn't see Ian watching him.

  Like he had promised, he had gone back to normal with life after that last little spat. It wasn't really an argument, it had been over too quickly. Thing was, Mickey had said he wanted a kid. Ian had been so hopeful in that moment, it was what he always wanted with a little Mickey running around. He had know idea how they would have the child, whether it be surrogate or adoption. He thought that adoption was probably off of the table with Mickey's criminal record.

  However, after that Mickey hadn't said another thing about the kid and it had been days. Either it had been moved to the back of his mind when Ian started acting normally again or he had just regretted his words. Ian didn't want to push him either way. He thought the regret was more likely however as Mickey had seemed more stressed than usual. After he had said it Ian had been all over him and they had fucked until they passed out, after that well...

  "Hey Firecrotch we need to talk about this kid," Mickey said suddenly. Well that was the silence over.

  "Yeah?"

  "So what do you want to do with it?" Mickey asked.

  "I want you to come with me right now okay," Ian replied. He drained his mug and then made his way to their room where he had a bag already made up, after grabbing it he went back and got Mickey.

  As they were walking down the streets Mickey kept asking him what he was doing and Ian kept replying that he would see. The thug was getting increasingly annoyed but Ian really needed Mickey to do this with him, to just see.

  When they reached their building Mickey turned to him with a furrowed brow but said nothing, knowing it was pointless. So they made their way up to their floor with the graffiti and the hole filled targets. Only then did Ian drop the bag and pull out to cans of beer.

  "Ian what the hell are you doing man? I'm serious, you need to answer me," Mickey practically growled.

  "Just humour me. I promise there is a point to this," Ian replied, holding out one can.

  It wasn't long before they were buzzed with both alcohol and weed and had slumped down together after some amazing sex. Mickey was curled half naked up into Ian's side while the redhead gently caressed his hair. The thug was content, eyes half closed and breathing soft. Ian, who was in much the same state of undress as the other man, knew that he had achieved what he had set out to do which was essentially showing Mickey a good time.

  "Okay Gallagher now you have to tell me why you dragged me out here," Mickey mumbled into Ian's chest.

  "Dragged? Like you didn't enjoy yourself," Ian snorted sleepily.

  "Yeah dragged tough guy. I came here in protest," Mickey retorted, jabbing a finger into Ian's side which made the paramedic squirm slightly.

  "You enjoying yourself was my point. Mickey, if we got a kid we wouldn't be able to just get up and do this, we would have a responsibility. I just needed you to be well aware on what you would loose," Ian told the other.

  "I know what I'm loosing Ian. I also know what I'm gonna gain. I want this kid," Mickey said firmly, pulling away slightly so that he could look his boyfriend in the eye.

  "Okay..." Ian smiled. They were really going to do this. Mickey really wanted that baby.

  "So I was thinking surrogate. I have savings, you have savings what better thing to spend them on than a child?" Mickey smiled, he stroked a hand gently over Ian's cheek with a look of pure love in his eyes.

  "Yeah definitely," Ian smiled back.

  "Can you imagine a little ginger baby running around. Any child with your DNA will be gorgeous," Mickey said softly, still looking at Ian still.

  "My DNA?" Ian started. He couldn't help it when he pulled away, a frown creasing his brow.

  "Yeah, I already have a kid. What's the problem?" Mickey asked suddenly worried.

  "I'm bipolar Mick. That's genetic. No way am I going to risk passing that on to anyone," Ian explained after taking a deep breath.

  Mickey was silent for a moment, taking in what his boyfriend had said. He knew what Ian said made sense, he also knew that Ian would not budge on that point as he thought that his bipolar was a curse.

  "Yeah okay. The world needs to get ready for another mini-me," Mickey smiled, Ian relaxing instantly.

  The redhead beamed at the other, lunging forward to wrap the smaller man in a  tight hug. Mickey rubbed his boyfriend's back soothingly as the other buried his face in Mickey's neck. Ian's excitement was infectious and he suddenly found that he couldn't wait, that he wanted the baby with them any minute now.

  "We're really doing this. Thank you so much Mick," Ian beamed.

  "No need to fucking thank me you dork. I want the damn little screamer too," Mickey beamed back.


	6. Surrogate

  In the end it was Mickey that chose the surrogate. That was mainly due to Ian faffing over it and not being able to make up his mind so when Mickey had told him that he was going to do it Ian had willingly handed over the reins. The paramedic had been at work in the final hours of his shift when he got the text from his boyfriend concerning the choice. He'd found one and was going to meet with her to start the whole thing next week. Of course the insemination thing was going to be done with a turkey baser because even though Mickey wasn't apposed to fucking women he said that he wouldn't do that to Ian. The ginger had definitely been touched at that.

  After that message Ian hadn't been able to wait to meet the woman- who Mickey had told them was called Jane. The ex con had refused to show Ian a picture of Jane although Ian had no idea why but really to him it didn't matter; they were having a baby. They had saved up and Jane was definitely affordable for them.

  When they finally met the woman and got the whole insemination part of the process done Ian couldn't have been happier. Jane was a lovely, friendly woman. She needed the money that surrogacy but said she had no maternal instincts so they wouldn't have to worry about her interfering with their lives after the baby was born.

  As they were leaving however Ian couldn't help but smirk over at his boyfriend who was walking happily along side him.

  "What the fuck are you looking at?" Mickey grumbled as he noticed Ian's expression.

  "Of course you picked a ginger," Ian commented.

  It was Mickey's turn to smirk then, he didn't say anything just continued to walk.

***

  After the first term was up and they got their scan they started shopping for baby things. Both of them had decided that they didn't want to know the gender of the baby so all the things were gender neutral.  They turned Terry's old room into the nursery when they weren't working.

  Ian often found himself sat in there once it was completed. He would look around at the pale green walls and yellow curtains, the crib and the little mobile that was made up of stars and the moon. Being in there looking at everything made it so  _real_. Almost even more real than seeing the scan. He still couldn't believe it though, the thought that he was going to be a father. Sure he had had Yevgeny but Yev was Mickey's kid not his. This child was going to be both of theirs.

  It was one day that he was sat in there against the wall with his knees drawn up to his chest that he first got scared. Then guilty. He was going to be a father... a bipolar one. Suddenly he was terrified that maybe he really would become Monica. Hell his siblings had told him he was just like her often enough. Look at how much she had broken all of their hearts. How could he ever know that he wouldn't do that to his own child? Maybe this wasn't such a great idea after all.

  Too late now though...

  Ian found himself curling further into himself, face now buried into his knees so he didn't have to see the room around him. He had taken his pills today so he knew this wasn't his bipolar messing him around, this was his own common sense.

  He heard the door open then and Mickey enter.

  "Hey Firecrotch I'm going down to the store, want any- Ian?" Mickey stopped talking when he saw the way his boyfriend was sat.

  The younger man felt a hand smooth down his arm as Mickey crouched besides him before he pressed a kiss into his fiery hair.

  "You okay?" he asked Ian.

  "What... what if I turn out to be just like Monica?" Ian whispered into his knees after a moment.

  "Monica? You won't be Monica. You're ten times the person that woman is already Ian," Mickey told him as he curled himself around the younger man, wrapping him up in his arms, "look at all the things that you do that she doesn't. You stick around when you say you will, you take your medication, you have a fucking kick-ass job for God's sake. I mean look at how you are with Yev."

  Ian looked up then at Mickey as the other stroked a soothing hand through his hair.

  "I love you so much Mick," he said, pressing a kiss against the brunette's lips.

  "Love you too tough guy."

***

  They decided on names one night after amazing sex and their post sex cigarette when they were lying tangled in each other's limbs. Ian's head had been resting on Mickey's chest where he could feel his breaths and hear his heart beating while he stroked down Mickey's side.

  It had actually been the older man that had brought it up. Surprisingly they had been able to decide rather quickly on what they would name the kid, boy or girl. They had settled on Anna for a girl and Thomas for a boy. Ian had fallen asleep with a smile that night as he imagined holding a little Anna or Thomas.

***

  Finally nine months was up and they got a call telling the two men that Jane was in labour. It had been a smooth pregnancy which was a godsend really and now the baby was almost there. Ian had been practically vibrating in the passenger seat on the way, something that Mickey had teased him about even though Ian knew that he was nervous himself.

  When they got there it was hours of labour and Ian just couldn't wait and finally the baby was there and squalling. The doctors wrapped it up and checked it over before passing it to Mickey. The shorter man held the bundle reverently and smiled down at the wrinkled face as Ian came up to look. He softly reached out and smoothed back the damp hair from the red face, instantly in love.

  "Well you boys have a lovely, healthy daughter there," the doctor told them, smiling as she removed her medical gloves.

  "Little Anna," Ian murmured as he looked down at the girl.

  Mickey leaned into Ian and the ginger pressed a kiss into his dark hair.

  "God it worked. We've got a little ginger screamer after all," Mickey commented quietly making Ian laugh. Sure enough the baby was already clearly a redhead. A little baby redhead just for them. 


End file.
